No worries

Yes kiddies I'm still living. Don't worry you haven't gotten rid of me yet. I have plenty of things to speak of and as always my mind is going a mile a minute. The problem simply is with all this crazy swirling around and in me when am I supposed to find the time to write these thoughts down? Hmm decisions decisions. I think i'll go ponder that while i stare blankly into space. You all have a lovely evening won't you 

Is what it is

Nothing goes as planned, but plans are made and plans often are broken. You want to know what else can be broken quite easily? A skull. A skull bashed against a wall breaks quite easily. That's just the way the world works. One solid surface will always claim victory over hollow shells. Don't be that shell. Fill your mind with knowledge so your skull can be the rock that bashes through the barriers of injustice.


Eat drink and be merry really that's all you can do. Enjoy in the spoils of this world as they are the limited joys provided to you. Why waste time being unhappy, when happiness is all the rage. Why fight releasing your true nature, why lock up your desires in a self made cage. Now I'm not saying everyone should do as they feel. We all know what's right vs what's wrong. This advice is mainly focused on each of us being real. Recognize who you are instead of what others would wish you to be. Yeah things aren't always great in life, but if you are happy within yourself you could live in your own joyous land of me.



Play the hand that life deals you. Their is no need to fold. This isn't a game of winners and losers. This is just a game of whether you die young or die old. Without knowing your conclusion there proves no point in always taking the most cautious path. If you don't know your expiration date then none of us knows how long the thrill of the game can last. Life is full of ups and downs highs and lows ebbs and flows. So just come along for the ride enjoy the wave take in the show.

- a look inside the mind of D -

Power On

The weight of the world on his shoulders, the struggle never quits. He keeps us steady upright and proper all the while no thanks given no praise bestowed. Why does he do it? No one truly knows, most in his situation would drop the giant ball that is this existence. Why do we pile on, adding more to this poor man's burden? Cuz we are evil bastards that's why.

Ready for the next challenge to move to grow. Work has begun and I can't wait to get into the full swing of things. Have a family to take care of and I refuse to drop the ball. If I prove myself and make real nice I can try and move up through the ranks. Who knows I maybe dragged back out to Vegas when they open the new store in 2012 but that's a distant idea for now. With that said on to DAY 2 and a much better tomorrow.

- a look inside the mind of D -

$£¥€

Back at it in the morning. Excited to finally be earning again, but nervous of what's to come. Not sure what to expect and have no clue as to the people I will meet. It's been awhile since my last grocery store crew and I can only hope this new batch of people will be as interesting, fun and genuine as the last. Not too worried have always been blessed with majority awesome co workers just hope to keep up that trend. Come 8am I should hopefully find out all the good and the bad which is to come in this new position.
- a look inside the mind of D -

Bad medicine

Talking with my wife got me thinking. I understand the medical system is flawed due to greed and/or stupidity, but how is it the FDA approves drugs to hit the market that side effects are worse then the problems they are trying to solve.


I mean really think about it. The other day, while watching commercials, I realized how bad some of these side effects could really be. Now we all know the ridiculousness of depression medicines giving you suicidal thoughts, thus defeating the purpose. That being said, have you heard of the medicines for digestion giving you diarrhea and/or constipation? I don't know about you but that sounds like you still have digestion issues. The newest one I heard yesterday was a drug used to assist the depression medicine you are already using, ya know just in case you still feel depressed. So this drug has common side effects like dry mouth, headaches, sore throat stuff, but the last two side effects named kind of blew my mind. This drug, that is supposed to cover up for the fact your other drug isn't working, has side effects including HIGH BLOOD SUGAR and LOW WHITE BLOOD CELL COUNT. Think about that for a second, they are asking you to take a medicine that's side effects are equal to symptoms you get from having Diabetes and AIDS. I don't know about you, but those side effects alone would cause my depression to worsen for sure.
So I ask anyone out there reading this, why do we allow our doctors to prescribe us things that will force us to return to them for another prescription and more money out of our pockets? This shit is getting ridiculous. I for one am tired of taking a drug for my lifelong high blood pressure that could possibly cause me kidney failure if I don't go to the doctor every six month to make sure I'm not killing myself. It's an outright crazy situation. Hell, my diabetes medicine can lead to extremely LOW blood sugar. Yeah that's right to cure my Diabetes they are willing to give me anemia. Yeah I'll either die of a STROKE if I don't take them or I slip into a COMA if I do. I'm sick of this system and I hope some real change will come in my lifetime so we all could lead happier healthier and wealthier lives.
- a look inside the mind of D -

Words

Feeling sketchy...



Uneasy and unaware. My surroundings out of focus. Life as good as it ever can or will be. And if it's all the same to you my time for change has come and gone. So ready for the new to begin again, you know what they say, when one door closes a window gets a brick through it letting opportunity in. So my friends I ask you who are your bricks. Who helps shine the light on the bigger and better things in your lives? Yeah that's what I thought, you've allowed me to be that brick. I take the task seriously so please allow me to break the glass and let some light shine through!

- a look inside the mind of D -

The nomad lives on

So I have now added the 562 to my list of lived area codes. this list seems to forever be expanding. Every few years I seem to find a new place to call home. I dream of settling, but a place to truly settle never comes. Why is that? Is it me or is it my locations? Am I just never satisfied in one place or do these places simply grow tired of me? I can never truly know. The people I encounter insure me I have made a difference in their lives. Frankly that is the ultimate goal of life, in my opinion, to reach out and positively affect as many lives possible. What better way to measure a life then in smiles and love? So though I'm forever passing through while I'm in that space it's best to be the best me I can be. So with that idea the best me I can be should breed nothing more then positivity correct?
- a look inside the mind of D -

it begins..the year as I see it

Week 1 has begun.





Sunday is upon us and the 2011 season has begun. We all endured a lockout and this season being up in the air. All that is the past the season has begun the first game was a wild one too bad the Saints were unable to run (last play of the game on the 1 yard line. Your team is a passing team, but instead of doing what you do best a run straight up the middle is called. Of course it failed it was doomed from the beginning). Now my attention turns to my beloved Eagles as overhyped as they may be. The Rams aren't much of a challenge, but anything can happen in the NFL.
Eagles have the eyes of the world on them thanks to a crazy productive shortened offseason. Well the season is on and my team better be as well. Only time will tell, but I can't wait to find out for sure. So cheers to a good season and I certainly hope a successful Eagles' campaign.
Now for the fun...

The year as seen by D!
NFC addition

NFC NORTH:
Vikings- though I Love Mcnabb this is the beginning of the ugly Viking end, honestly last year was but the woes will continue. I say now they will be last in the NFC North.

Bears- not sure on this one. It's not a bad team, but don't see them dominating as much as they used to. I'm guessing 8-8 plus or minus one game.

Lions- lots of big talk surrounding this team, but it's a little hard to digest. To get the Lions back to playoff form will take not just putting a good team on the field, but it will also take changing the entire culture of losing the team has established for so long. That being said this will be their year to do so. Think it's impossible? Well tell that to the Sean Payton era Saints!

Packers- yes they are the defending champs and it helps they won the opening game of the season, but let's be real. It's incredibly hard for a champ to repeat and though they won it was an ugly game with no defense shown which could have been easily won by the the Saints had they called the right play at the end. I'm saying 2nd in the division under the Lions.

NFC SOUTH:
Buccaneers- like the team and they are really good, but sadly they are in one tight division where it can be anyone's to win. Don't know but don't think this will be the year 2nd in the division and two games outside of the playoffs

Panthers- ok know how I said it's anyone's division to win? Yeah, I wasn't speaking of this crew of ragamuffins. Cam's first season will be a success but sadly rookie QBs get you last in this division.

Falcons- it's theirs to lose in my eyes. Yes the Bucs and Saints are both good but the Falcons will rule the south this season.

Saints- the first game showed me one thing. They will put up some amazing offensive stats this year, but the defense will lead them straight to third in the division.

NFC EAST:
Eagles- I've said it all in my above post. Not only will they take the division they will be in the fight to take the conference in the end.

Giants- one manning down leaves all eyes on little bro. Yes he has a ring but the spotlight burns.. Third in the east.

Redskins- why are they even bothering. Yes I may be bias as I'm a McNabb guy through and through, but Shanahan & son are going to run an already bad team even lower. What is this Major League? Are the redskins going to be headed LA way if they keep producing crap seasons?

Cowboys- I hate them I HATE them I HATE THEM!!! That being said last year was a fluke and this year they will return to the playoffs once again and a solid 2nd n the division.

NFC WEST:
Rams, Seahawks, Cardinals- this division doesn't matter, but this should be the year that anyone can return to the promised land especially since 7-9 can take the division. I'm seeing a three way tie for crapiness here so it's really a coin toss. Maybe all the promise of Kolb greatness may give the Cards the edge, but as I was never a follower of the Kolb I'm kind of doubting that.

49ers- they aren't even going to try this year. Harbaugh wants his college star and if you honestly think they planned on winning this year explain More ALEX SMITH. I mean really, haven't we all abandoned that ship yet?




- a look inside the mind of D -

High School drama

Remember the days. First day of freshman year. Four years of possibility laid out in front of you. You walk through the halls unsure unaware if you'd find acceptance or be relegated to the outskirts the outside looking in at all the kids who you had wished you would become.


Walking from your home room to algebra you saw something very intriguing in the hall. It was your ultimate fear placed on poster board the BACK to SCHOOL dance was fast approaching. Every one in school would be attending and you couldn't afford to miss it, but should you actually brave the crowd and go? First High School dance the ultimate fork in the road of our early teens. That dance can lead to utter humiliation ultimate elation or there is always the third option. A humdrum night which means you may just live the under the radar life for the following four years. I sadly had the third, which is neither bad nor good it is what it is.
1995 freshman year De La Salle high school. Me and a jr high friend attend the dance together which I still don't understand why I mean I guess she was being my pity date, but how is it pity if I didn't even like her like that? Anyway we arrive separately take like 1 picture she goes off with her girls I go off with my homies and I don't remember us spending another moment together for the rest of the night. The only thing I remember positive about the night is one of the cooler guys from my class was so jealous I was going with her. He thought she was hot so in his eyes I was the man, which is a feeling I've never had before and I must say I enjoyed it. So I must say thanks to Katy for giving that one brief moment of coolness, trust me it was never felt again in the next four years. Who knows if I had stayed in DLS I might have achieved that level of greatness again but my evil parental units snatched me away after one year and shipped me off to craptastic Bishop O'Dowd (not a bad school, but anytime you enter a new school sophomore year and not knowing a single soul you are destined to have horrible memories of the place).
Now O'Dowd may have been better remembered if I had been better at reading women. Not knowing a soul I had a very cute classmate basically begging me to attend the very same start of the year dance I had no problem attending my freshman year, but this was a new school with new kids and I was so far on the outside and completely oblivious to the fact the girl obviously liked me I just didn't bother to go. Of course this blew my shot at an early high school relationship (which are so key to dating life survival) and somewhat tainted the only friendship I had formed at the moment. Let's just say the remaining three years becoming a blur of blown opportunities and other random anomalies. So ya see kids that first dance can set up so much more then learning how to cope in the crowd, it really is important to prepare you for the years ahead. Trust Frosh & Soph years are so important to establish early successes or you will be in for a world full of pain.
After relieving these memories I can only say one thing.
THANK GOD I'M 30!

- a look inside the mind of D -

Just keep going

Life as I know it has stayed unchanged. People all around me still look at me strange. Unclear Unsure Unaware yet still knowing with a helping hand we will soon to be glowing. Life has drawn me away from my more creative self while looking for a living my other life of words and creativity must be placed on the shelf. Is this how the local executives loose their sense of self. Putting away the imagination so they could find a home that fits them best. When creativity is shelved what remains is utter crap. The leftover brings us 80s movie remakes and white girls who are convinced they can rap. This is an epidemic and I'm on ground zero so I guess I'll have to continue writing so I can become the imaginations' Hero!


- a look inside the mind of D -

Sky's the Limit

Cloudy days give way to sunshine tomorrow...


As longs as I think act and speak freely my life will be all it was meant to be. No more No less even with minimal effort. Now with troubles all over the planet crashing down upon us maybe it's time to find our higher purpose.
So how does one find their calling? It's simply really, figure out what excites you, fascinates you, or makes you think laugh or smile. Once that's discovered the trick is how to turn that passion into your cash cow. This sadly I have no idea on how to do. Wish I did but sadly I have no clue.

How do we get anything done?

Reading a yahoo article on yet another candidate for presidency, listening to all the rhetoric, seeing how for CBN (Christian Broadcast Network) he changed his stance on abortion and Gay marriage (before he was let the states decide guy, now BAN them across the nation) it really hits me.... I love my country, but I hate what the governing bodies have done. What amazes me most is there is no further talk of civil war era type secession. Yes I know that's a bit extreme but I can't be the only way utterly disgusted by how ass backwards things have gotten thanks to our, rampant bipartisanship, our need to constantly put the other party in their place even if it means hurting the American public as a whole, and our complete lack of separation between church and state. "But D the church gives us our moral values by which we govern, so a true separation would be ludicrous", well I say BULLSHIT. Church though helpful to some, is not at the heart of what we should use to make our decisions by. What happened to common decency the ability to tell right from wrong, that wasn't implanted in us by a preacher. You know it's wrong to push an old lady in the street or to kick a young child in the face because it just IS. No one had to teach you that, no invisible deity had to explain to you that taking someone else's right to live is not in the best interest of society, no your humanity your decency your inner spirit and thought processes all guided you to that decision. You know what your church did teach you? How to hate, how to degrade, how to judge others and punish those that you are made uncomfortable by. All these lessons come to us from a supposed book of Love. I'm a long time scholar of religion and I find it amazing how many ways a group of people can read a sentence a book a passage of religious doctrine and take it in so many different ways. My absolute favorites are groups who by reading a book written centuries after the savior is gone can tell me that this same book is the direct words of that same savior. Also how the savior a man of understanding, love and peace wants them to deny groups, they personally see unfit, their rights to the same life the believers lead. Oh and the ultimate ass backward standard of our governing bodies religious ideal is the fact a direct passage from the savior states save the judgement for the father for it's not Mans place to make such judgement, but then these believers these followers these oh so Holy men and women turn around and make laws based on the judgements they where told it's not their place to make. A man and a man or a woman and a woman can't be married cuz God said so! Where in the hell does God say those words directly? Also if God has nothing to do with the matters of state why does your view on what God wants have anything to do with those men and this women's rights? I've grown tired of these arguments with no basis in common reality. I find myself frustrated with the way things work around me. Political figures that swear they will make changes do nothing more then make it to their appointed offices and fall right in line with the others. We need a change, no fuck that we need a freaking overhaul! We need people to care how the world is around them again. We need fire and passion to spew from the souls of our men and women in power. We need the almighty dollar and the holy bible to stop being what guides our political futures. The world needs Justice, Understanding, and most of all compassion for our fellow man. The planet is changing and it's not looking like for the better. In our remaining millennia or so of life on this planet I can only hope one day Utopias can and will be achieved. Peace and goodness for future generations is a lofty dream, but it's one we once had believed in. Now our largest goal is a stable economy and to avoid becoming property of China. This is a goal that is very achievable if we would stop focusing on party lines, stop listening to religious lies, and start doing what's right for the country as a whole not just for our individual selves.


- a look inside the mind of D -

Welcome Welcome

Good news came today so now surviving can be achieved. Now it's time for me to step up my game so things that are good can remain the same. The bad may change as soon as it's ready, but I have the sinking feeling the silly crap will remain steady. I am definitely enjoying my time though I need to step up my social game. Time to get up and out and take full advantage of my new surroundings. Anybody ready to visit and hit the beach?
Waves crashing, sand between the toes cool California breeze and now that the wifey is going to be working in HB (Huntington Beach) I figure while I search for a gig I could beach bum around Huntington for awhile. I mean what a great idea, a large black male bumming around an OC Beach; the locals would lavish me with love don't ya think?

a look inside the mind of D

Viva Revolution!

You may not see it but trust me it's there. They are watching, tracking and informing all about you. Oh sure you are connecting with the masses they allow you to inform the world of your every thought, deep or shallow,necessary or not.
Behold the world wide web trembles at your feet as your every thought is posted pictured pinged and placed.


The thing about it is, we do all this posting informing and advising the masses without ever stopping to think who is really viewing it. No not just the weird kid you bullied in the fourth grade; no I'm not speaking of the geeky kid who had that crush on you freshman year, and no I'm not even thinking of that one night fling that stalked you for a month in college. Now we all know about the corporations who have had all our thoughts and feelings scoped out through these sites for the greater part of a decade now. I mean those of you who were shocked to find this information out simply amaze me. I mean come on why else would major corporations pay these computer geeks big bucks for rights to their sites? I mean if they weren't being used for cheap public relations for research and development at no cost and for instant feedback on all the latest things they bring to the market do you really believe these companies would give a damn?



No all that is besides the point all those things have been great uses of the internet age we live. The ultimate works social media has presented to the world is simple. Through our social web addictions our TRUE masters control us all. Think about it through the millions of tweets the trillions of status updates the oodles of blogs and picture post any truly powerful sect could sway and mold us to do and feel what they want us to. We can attempt to fight it all we want, but it's hard to wage a war while being dependent on the enemy to get your cries for freedom out to others. No one can hear you scream and shout when you are being held by the throat, but still we try. The masses should know things are never what they seem. So many free thoughts being expressed worldwide so easily obviously would have to come with a catch.



So what do we do now? My words have shined a light onto the big bosses who live to control our way of life even while giving us the deep illusion of freedom. These words that have reached you through their devices will hopefully be the key that fits the ignition of true freedom that will lead to their undoing. They shall label me mad, they will lead you to believe me a nut or paranoid, but keep this in mind if my words are so simple so silly so mad why do they strike such a nerve. Why should my post disappear once written why will these words almost never reach those who need to see them? Why should such a basic idea in a free society prove so difficult to express? Why else but the fact we aren't truly free. Freedom is the illusion your Masters allow you to have to keep you inline. If they took it away completely you would more easily rebel!
- a look inside the mind of D -

Less is more

The water's call is the wave's crash. A call of this nature must be answered. So answer it we shall!


We leave for a new destination we travel down a brand new path. Where it leads we can't be sure of, but one thing is for sure it's going to be fun. So ready for the change the upcoming days are going to bring. Massive purchases big bills increasing pay and new scenery all in mind; these are the things that continue to light the path even during the darker times. So lighted paths are to be followed any fears can be swallowed down, we keep moving forward with the knowledge it's the right thing to do. So here we go off into the sunset me and my love off towards the Ocean Blue.
-

a look inside the mind of D

-

¿Qué Ríco?

The exotic women of this world will be the death of us all.


They have proven to be the death of many a man. Now I know what you are thinking, hey how dare you make such generalizations! I say simply this it's my blog and I'll write what I want to. So excuse me if you plain Janes of the world feel like you deserve some attention.


Well you aren't going to find it here. Oh and my definition of plain Jane is most likely different from yours. To me Blonde hair + Blue eyes + Big boobs= snorefest. I mean after the 80s you can find that any and everywhere. So keep your Deckers and Livelys and give me some Gonzales and Jacksons.



Life is meant for variety. As written in the past, women are the ultimate gift in life yet a woman's scorn is Earth's greatest curse. This is my warning to the world don't take their beauty for granted, though with age it may fade their souls grow more gorgeous with each passing day. If you turn them away for fear of commitment and containment eventually you'll find yourself alone wishing someone saw you as being worth capturing.



Never judge the film by it's trailer it's never as good as it seems and a book rarely matches with the dullness of it's cover. The ladies can easily be the same way. Things are never as they seem, and what seems to be fact most often is a work of pure fiction.


In my experience the quit and shy by the looks of it just may surprise you, whereas those who talk a big game most often fail to live up to their own self promotion. Innocence sheds off quickly and quirkiness is an illusion of self. Dull and boring is truly non existent if you open your mind, and what turns on so many in all honesty is really desired by so few.


So viva la white girl if you must, but they can prove to be too much. After the insanity wears itself away what is left. Formerly a good time, but quickly good times can fade.


So do what you will just recognize life is about more then the party and eventually you'll need to find what's real! You'll get there someday my friends, you'll get there someday.

I'm thoroughly enjoying my reality my friends

Hitting the road once again, things are always moving changing morphing for the better. Things go crazy at times, but the crazy is what makes it simply magical. Tomorrow begins the final countdown, all the earning and savings will hit it's final leg. This is the section we call "The FINAL COUNTDOWN" (*play epic music here*) there is no turning back.
So much to do in a limited amount of time. Yes, the time crunch is definitely on my mind, but I know it is all for the best. In order to be at our best we must put ourselves to the ultimate test. We are ready to prove we can be as good or better then the rest for success is our ultimate quest. Never believe life isn't meant to be a fest, live your life full of laughter happiness and jest. ok done with this test the rhyming is more than i can digest so I will give it a rest as I know I'm simply the best in the quest for jest.

- a look inside the mind of D -

Lockout #2

Well well well another labor dispute in professional sports leads to another Lockout. Problem is the NFL Lockout isn't looking to threaten the season. Shockingly enough though the football season is right around the corner all signs are pointing to a season will happen and possibly in time. Now the NBA season just ended so the next season is forever away, but somehow according to the people who know everything the 2011- 2012 season is in question. Seems hard to believe, but the billionaires the multi-millionaires and the partial millionaires are so apart on all the issues that resolution looks mikes and miles away. Certainly hope they can come to a compromise, though I'm not the biggest BBall fan in the world I do enjoy checking in throughout the season. Besides this past finals was awesomely amazing you have to be insane to follow it up with no games being played.


- a look inside the mind of D -

More Enzo genius

I look at this and all I hear is LET'S START a RIOT a RIOT LET'S START a RIOT!

Of course we all know that's not the right thing to do. Honestly who thinks rioting would be a fun thing to do. Like for the thrill of it I'm going to riot because frankly skydiving is just far too expensive and bungee jumping is over too fast. No riots aren't a party people they never are. Yes you may get some very "groovy" pics out of it and maybe one day you can BS the grandkids about how you FOUGHT THE SYSTEM but in all honesty we know what the deal was. You and your buddies got drunk saw a crowd and said HEY lets see what shit i can get out of that store I've always been too broke to shop at. Yeah we know the truth, but don't worry we won't tell. Just fork over one of those flat screens and a couple of those games and you can BUY our SILENCE.

PC is for the birds

You know what I'm tired of sitting back and watching us all go through our days grasping on to the fake ass notion that polite is always right. When did this start back up again. I'm all for the anti bullying campaigns, bullies are annoying assholes, but when did stopping bullying become forming support groups? I remember when the best way to stop a bully was either kicking their ass or if you couldn't take them then you'd find someone who could. I mean a group of peers is nice and all, a bunch of bitches spouting about their feelings what fun, but peer groups are usually the cause of bullying not the solution; unless they are a mob of course.
Ok name calling is unnecessary and rather childish, but why is me using a name to describe a situation, NOT a person, such an issue now? Ok I get the "this is so Gay" remark is a problem as it defines a group of people. So fine gay as an insult goes out the window, but this whole you can't say Retarded is killing me. Now hear me out. The retard vs gay thing seems like the same issue, but there is a twist. A few years back it was drummed into our head retard is not to be used to describe any "Handicapped persons". Have we forgotten the PC of the past already. Little People not Midgets; Handicapped not Retarded; Republican not White land owning money grubbing devil spawn. Ok I kid I kid democrats are hell's minions too just to let you know.
All I know is the world needs some more open thinkers, and fewer whiny bitches. I'm so saddened by the fact years after we loose George Carlin we loose all sense of questioning what the masses deem right. What happened to not blindly following the herd? I don't know about you, but I refuse to be just another lemming being lead off the cliff.
If things keep going the direction they are going in the rules will change daily. You can not refer to anyone or anything by any word a passerby could possibly hear and take offense. Pretty soon no race will be defined by their pre defined race designation, I mean after all when you look at me I'm not black. Licorice is black I'm brown, and I'm not African Ive never been there in my life. Oh and the argument "that's where your people originally come from" can and should be thrown out the window. If we go by history and science books Africa is the cradle of all civilization. That being said then we are all AFRICANS you Neo-nazi fuckheads! So in the future I will not be defined as black except on the rare occasions where such a designation will benefit me; no, I am EstreetHaywardianOaklandBayArea-ite. After all that IS where I came from!
Yes they may be a mouthful, but I assure you anyone hearing the description should have to work real hard to try and take offense to any part of it. I mean in the end it's all about what others think about our own personal private thoughts that matters right? Oh I say FUCK THAT. No I don't want a future full of insensitive assholes, that is not what I'm going for, but I am asking for common sense to come back into fashion and basic inherit wisdom to play a larger part in all our daily lives.


- a look inside the mind of D -