Halloween

I have thoroughly enjoyed this day frankly it's my favorite holiday that isn't gift related. Dressing up in scary and/or funny costumes, running amok in the streets, poisoning children with candy and other assorted sugary goods; this truly is a blessed day. And by blessed I mean highly evil and/or blasphemous, but that's what makes it so special. Even though all I do is get dressed up to hand out candy I still find it an amazingly entertaining holiday. My favorite are the elaborate costumes and the little kids who truly get into the spirit. For awhile today I thought we would be deprived trick or treaters, but after a long lull we were flooded with trick or treaters, Pez dispensers & full size candy bars made us a very popular destination. My wife and I had a blast and we look forward to being able to do it next year while in a home of our own in Southern California.... I say we have a crazy Halloween party and invite everyone we know. I'm not sure we'll have the space for that, but who knows what the future holds.

Halloween

Plain and simply the most fun holiday that doesn't involve receiving presents. I have no big plans but I have promised to dress up... and NO nothing too embarrassing! Sorry people no pictures of me in a dress as my wife seems to want to happen. (she wants to dress as a pimp and have me be her bottom bitch...HELL NO) That idea aside with T-Minus 2 days and counting I still have to come up with some idea. As of now the front runner would be me getting a yellow t shirt Blue pants pick out my hair grow out my mustache (yes it grows fast so 2 days of not shaving and BOOM mustache man) and using my high voice and magically I will be transformed into CLEVELAND BROWN. Simple idea but Cleveland was the weakest of all the Family Guy characters though I know i can easily pull the look off. I really don't know what I should do. Maybe i'll just wimp out and buy a mask or put a bunch of crazy paint on my face. So if anyone has any advice I'm glad to hear it. What should I do keep in mind I have 2 days and a very little budget.

Where to Now?

So many years spent on the road no real destination in mind just traveling through towns cities communities and assorted lives. I call no place "Home". I call everyone "Friend". I lead the life of a gypsy, but after 20+ years I must stop and ask myself where to now? Never before have I known what life had in store for me, yet now I find myself wanting to have a plan. In my past I was never truly aware how long my stay in any location would last, but now I find myself wanting to take root in one place though where that place is I have no clue. Be it age or exhaustion I find myself trying to cling to a vine with which to tie my life into place, but there are no vines for me there is no place I shall ever call Home. No mine is a life made to wander. Now don't you dare go pitting me for I have seen things most will never see. I have experienced things most will never experience. The world has been my playground and I have thoroughly enjoyed running her streets, swimming in her waterways, and embracing the many souls who inhabit her. All these things being blessing and yet I crave something more. Something permanent. Something.... fulfilling. Maybe I should pick a location at random and attempt to set my life up there, but I fear doing that...it would really suck to pick the absolutely wrong location from the draw of a hat. So what to do? Where to go? I know I'll just drink and when I sober up wheresoever I am that's where I shall permanently stay. Just hope I don't wake up on a ship... again; the sea and I just don't get along. My time on the SS Rust Bucket were the longest 3 years of my life. Just me and a ship full of sea men.... after that I knew how Kim Kardashian's belly must have felt any given weekend of her late teens. But I digress that's a story for another day and it gets me off my point. Wait what was my point......SHIT...... I knew i started drinking to early.

guy with time on his hand

Open the door and let some damn air in already. It's very stuffy in this box of a room and I enjoy reminders of what freedom had once felt like. It has been so long since I was free. Hell I'm shocked I even remember that word. FREE! Well its a meaningless concept to me. Now don't get me wrong, I completely deserve what I have gotten. My mistake wasn't so much in what I did, but in how I attempted to defend it. I knew I should have gone with a different attorney "Attempted Murder isn't Murder. It's a failure to commit an act and isn't that punishment enough honor? My client is already a proven failure!" I must have been really drunk on toilet wine when he pitched that idea and I agreed it could work. I guess things worked out for the best though after such a feeble attempt at a defense the judge took pity on me; hiring a mentally challenged attorney definitely earned the favor points; and so here I sit minimum security. How can this be you ask? Its all in who you are trying to kill. You see I wasn't attempting to do anything wrong honestly I was just attempting to do what the world knows needed to be done. So here I sit upset at my own failure reminded on a daily basis my target got away. What the parole board doesn't know is I have not given up on my mission it has simply been delayed. So I write this letter not as a warning but simply as a promise that next time my aim will be true. I will shave that pube faced bastard and pop the implants of his ignorant concubine I will end their torment of this earth for they are a waste of everyone's time. I shall end the careers of these 2 blonde haired fools I am simply a tool of the heavens to bring the world peace and by my hands the death of SPEIDI will bring this world relief. Heidi and Spencer be warned when I'm out in 16 months it'll be my mission to destroy you annoying little cunts. Oh and also know after them Joe Francis is next simply because that douche should have been dealt with ages ago.